How to Talk About Mental Health Without Shame: Mental Health Awareness Month

May is Mental Health Awareness Month—a time to turn up the volume on conversations that have lived too long in hushed tones. This isn’t just a calendar event. It’s a call to action. It’s a chance to wipe the fog off the mirror, look ourselves in the eyes, and ask: Why are we still whispering about something that affects every single one of us?

Imagine for a moment that your house has a cracked foundation. You didn’t ask for it. Maybe the soil shifted beneath you, or perhaps the house was built on uneven ground. You wouldn’t feel ashamed of that, right? You’d call someone in, get an assessment, and take steps to fix it. But when it comes to our mental health—the very foundation of how we see ourselves and the world—we're often taught to board up the windows and act like nothing’s wrong.

Mental health isn’t a character flaw, a sign of weakness, or a personal failure. It’s a part of being human. And it’s time we stop whispering about it like it's a dirty word. If your brain is part of your body, then talking about mental health should be no more shameful than talking about a broken bone.

So, why does shame still hover over mental health conversations like a stubborn storm cloud?

The Inherited Silence: Where the Stigma Began

We didn’t start the stigma. Like outdated wallpaper plastered on generation after generation, it was passed down—an inheritance wrapped in whispers. Decades ago, mental health was treated like a leaky pipe: you either ignored it or locked the door and hoped no one would notice the damage. This culture of silence didn’t just encourage secrecy—it taught people to wear masks.

But masks get heavy. And no one heals in hiding.

We shame what we fear. We fear what we don’t understand. And we misunderstand what we never take the time to know. That’s why mental health stigma thrives in silence and dies in dialogue.

This month—Mental Health Awareness Month—is our invitation to peel off the masks and speak honestly, not just about diagnoses, but about the pain, healing, struggle, and strength that live within us all.

Talking About Mental Health: Changing the Language of Shame

To begin healing the collective wound, we must start by changing the way we talk about mental health.

🧠 Avoid labels that reduce a person to their diagnosis.
Instead of saying, “She’s bipolar,” say, “She’s living with bipolar disorder.” We don’t say, “He’s cancer,” we say, “He has cancer.” This one small shift in language returns humanity to the person.

🌱 Normalize the spectrum of struggle.
You don’t need a diagnosis to deserve support. Having a hard time doesn’t make you “crazy.” It makes you human. Everyone carries invisible backpacks—some are heavier than others. And sometimes, it’s okay to ask for help carrying yours.

🔥 Drop the 'just get over it' rhetoric.
Telling someone to "snap out of it" is like handing crutches to someone with a broken leg and scolding them for limping. Mental health challenges aren’t about willpower—they’re about wiring, circumstance, trauma, and biology. Recovery isn’t linear, and healing doesn’t obey a stopwatch.

🎭 Create space, not solutions.
Sometimes, people don’t need advice. They need a soft place to land. Be that place. Ask, “How can I support you?” rather than, “Have you tried yoga?” Talking about mental health doesn’t mean fixing someone. It means witnessing them without judgment.

Metaphors for the Mind: Making the Invisible Visible

Let’s use what we understand to explain what we don’t:

• Mental health is like weather. Some days are sunny; some are stormy. You don’t blame the sky for raining. You grab an umbrella and wait it out.

• The brain is a garden. It needs sunlight, water, rest, and care. Sometimes weeds grow—anxiety, depression, trauma. Ignoring them doesn’t make them go away. Naming them does. Tending to them does.

• Emotions are messengers, not enemies. They’re like the dashboard lights in your car—signals, not signs of failure. Shame turns the light off. Compassion asks, “What needs attention?”

When we talk openly, we strip the shame from the signal. And when we do that, we make space for others to do the same.

To Those Who Stigmatize

If you’ve ever rolled your eyes at someone for being “too sensitive” or dismissed a friend’s panic attack as drama, this part is for you. You’re not the enemy—but your silence might be. The truth is, mental health stigma isn’t just cruel—it’s dangerous.

Would you laugh at someone for having diabetes? Would you mock a kid who needed glasses? Mental health conditions are no different.

Shame keeps people from seeking help. Shame kills. Compassion saves.

You don’t have to understand everything about someone’s mental health to respect their journey. You just have to be willing to listen—and believe them when they say they’re hurting.

Mental Health Awareness Month challenges you to reflect on your own reactions. Are you part of the stigma, or part of the solution?

Becoming a Safe Place

So, how do we become safe places for others—and ourselves?

🌻 Speak openly about your own mental health. When appropriate, sharing your story helps others see they aren’t alone.

🪞 Unlearn judgment. Challenge the inner voice that still wants to call someone lazy, dramatic, or unstable. Ask yourself: what if they’re surviving something I can’t see?

🔑 Use people-first language and empathy-driven questions. Instead of “What’s wrong with you?” try “What happened to you?” or “What are you needing today?”

🧰 Keep your mental health toolbox stocked. Encourage therapy, mindfulness, community support, medication when needed, and boundaries. These aren’t crutches. They’re tools.

💬 Speak up when others joke at someone’s expense. Even if it’s “just a joke,” stigma survives through laughter. Be brave enough to say, “That’s not okay.”

We can’t build a stigma-free culture overnight, but each act of compassion becomes a brick in the foundation. And this month gives us permission—no, a responsibility—to start building.

Resources for Support & Information

If you or someone you love is struggling with mental health, don’t wait for permission to speak up. There are safe places to land, and people who will not only listen—but understand.

🔹 McHenryCounseling.com – A trusted resource for education, support, and therapeutic tools designed to help individuals and families navigate their mental health journey with dignity and compassion.

🔹 National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) – nami.org
Find resources, support groups, and mental health education in your area.

🔹 Mental Health America – mhanational.org
Take a mental health screening or learn more about how different conditions affect the brain and behavior.

🔹 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline – Dial or text 988
Free, confidential support 24/7 for anyone in emotional distress.

Let’s Talk—Out Loud and Without Shame

The truth is, everyone is one life event away from needing mental health support. A loss. A diagnosis. A breakup. A global pandemic. Mental health isn’t for “those people”—it’s for all people.

Talking about mental health is an act of courage. Listening without judgment is an act of love. And doing both without shame? That’s how we create change.

So let’s rip off the outdated wallpaper, open the windows, and let light into the room. The conversation is already happening—will you be part of it?