🌿 The Restless Mirror: Why We See Ourselves Through Others’ Eyes

 🌿 The Restless Mirror: Why We See Ourselves Through Others’ Eyes

💭 We spend our lives standing before mirrors that tremble, mirrors held by the hands of others. Their grip shifts, their moods change, and suddenly the reflection staring back bends and stretches to fit their expectations. From childhood, we learn to see ourselves through someone else’s lens: the approving smile of a parent, the praise of a teacher, the digital applause of likes and hearts on a glowing screen. Each one teaches us that worth comes from reflection.

🌸 But the mirror we look into was never truly ours. Over time, we polish and reshape what others wish to see until our own image fades beneath fingerprints of approval and disappointment alike. The reflection becomes a stranger wearing our skin.

🧠 Neuroscientists call this mirroring—the brain’s natural echo system, wired to help us empathize, belong, and understand others. It is a beautiful design, but one easily hijacked by the craving for acceptance. When our reward system lights up at every nod of approval, validation can become its own addiction. And like any addiction, the high fades quickly, leaving us chasing the next reflection to prove we still exist.

💔 We have all stood there, waiting for someone else to tell us who we are. It is a quiet ache, the fear that without an audience, we will vanish. When the applause fades and the mirror turns away, the silence can feel unbearable. That is when the question begins to echo: Who am I when no one is watching?

🌱 There comes a moment when the distortion becomes too heavy to carry, when the reflection feels more like a performance than a truth. It is then that we begin to reach for our own mirror, one that does not tremble in someone else’s hands. This mirror does not rely on praise or permission. It reflects what is real: the parts of you that exist even when no one claps.

🔥 Reclaiming this mirror takes courage. It begins in the pause before seeking reassurance, in the breath between reaction and reflection. It grows when you ask yourself, What do I think of me? and answer honestly, even if the truth feels small at first. Each time you do, the mirror steadies a little more. The reflection becomes clearer, more familiar, more yours.

☀️ The restless mirror grows still the day you stop chasing every reflection. When you can stand in the quiet, see your own face, and no longer feel the need to adjust it, that is when you finally come home to yourself.

💖 Today, I hold my own mirror steady. I see myself through eyes that no longer need permission.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Understanding Microaggressions: Their Impact and Examples

Image
  Microaggressions, subtle and often unintentional expressions of bias or prejudice, can significantly affect individuals' daily lives and belief systems. These seemingly minor slights, whether verbal or non-verbal, reinforce negative stereotypes and contribute to a hostile environment for marginalized groups. Understanding microaggressions and their impact is crucial for fostering inclusive and respectful communities. What Are Microaggressions? Microaggressions are everyday verbal, non-verbal, and environmental slights or insults that, whether intentional or not, communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to individuals based on their marginalized group membership. These actions or comments are often disguised as compliments or jokes, making them more insidious and harder to address. Examples of Microaggressions Racial Microaggressions : Comments like "You speak English so well" directed at a person of color, implying that being articulate in English is unusua...
Read more

Understanding Emotional Self-Harm: The Invisible Wounds We Inflict on Ourselves

Image
When we think of self-harm, visible scars often come to mind. However, emotional self-harm, though less visible, can be just as destructive. Among its many forms, emotionally beating oneself up—through harsh self-criticism, negative self-talk, and relentless self-blame—is one of the most common and insidious. This behavior not only undermines self-worth but perpetuates cycles of mental and emotional pain that are difficult to escape. At its core, emotional self-harm is the opposite of emotional self-care or self-compassion . Where emotional self-harm involves criticism, punishment, and negativity, emotional self-care prioritizes kindness, understanding, and growth. Emotional self-compassion encourages nurturing your well-being through positive self-talk, healthy coping strategies, and self-acceptance. It’s about treating yourself with the same care and respect you’d show a dear friend—valuing your progress, forgiving mistakes, and building a foundation for emotional healing. Let’s div...
Read more

Embracing Neurodiversity: Understanding, Supporting, and Thriving

Image
  In a world where diversity is celebrated, it's crucial to extend that celebration to the realm of neurodiversity. Neurodivergence refers to the natural variation in neurological structures and functions, encompassing conditions such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia, and more. Understanding neurodiversity entails recognizing that different brains are wired differently, and this diversity brings unique strengths, perspectives, and challenges to individuals. Who does neurodiversity affect? The answer is simple: it touches the lives of millions worldwide. According to the World Health Organization, approximately 1 in 7 people globally are neurodiverse. However, the impact extends far beyond those individuals themselves, touching their families, friends, colleagues, and communities. How Neurodivergence Affects Individuals and Their Networks For neurodiverse individuals, navigating a world often designed for neurotypical minds can present significant challenges. Sensory sensitivities, difficu...
Read more