When the Holidays Hurt

Understanding the Rise in Depression and Suicidal Struggles This Time of Year

The holiday season is painted as warm, bright, and full of meaning. It is the time when the world seems to expect joy, connection, and celebration from everybody at once. Yet the truth is far more human. For many, the holidays stir up a season of heaviness. Depression increases. Emotional crises rise. People who are already struggling often find themselves hurting even more when the world around them seems to be moving in the opposite direction.

This rise in emotional pain has nothing to do with weakness. It is the simple truth that the holidays magnify whatever someone already carries inside them. When life has been heavy, the extra weight of the season settles into tender places.

Why Depression Increases Around the Holidays

The holidays intensify loneliness. When everyone else seems to have a place to go, a family to return to, or a circle to gather with, anyone on the outside of that circle feels the emptiness more sharply. Loneliness becomes louder because the season itself celebrates togetherness.

Grief rises for many. Every memory becomes a reminder. The chair that used to be full is now empty. The person who once brought laughter is no longer here. Holidays tend to pull those memories to the surface whether someone is ready or not.

Financial strain plays a larger role than most people admit. Even when the struggle is small, the weight of wanting to give or provide can turn into shame. That shame quietly deepens depression and makes people feel as though they have failed their families.

Expectations add another layer of pressure. The world paints the holidays as joyful. When someone cannot feel the joy they believe they are supposed to feel, self judgment grows. It becomes easy to think something is wrong with them when in truth, nothing is wrong. They are simply hurting.

Shorter days and decreased sunlight deepen biological depression for many. Those with seasonal affective patterns feel the emotional shift before they even notice the change in daylight.

For people with a history of trauma, certain holiday smells, sounds, gatherings, or memories can bring emotional flashbacks. Their bodies remember what their minds wish they could forget.

Populations Most Affected and Why

Several groups experience an even heavier emotional load this time of year.

People who live alone often face painful levels of isolation. When the environment around them celebrates family and connection, solitude becomes harder to bear.

Those grieving a recent loss or an anniversary of loss feel the season intensely. Holidays highlight who is no longer here more than any ordinary day ever could.

Individuals with chronic or untreated mental health conditions such as major depression, anxiety disorders, PTSD, or bipolar disorder are at increased risk for emotional overwhelm. The season adds a pressure that existing coping skills may not be able to hold without support.

Teenagers and young adults often struggle with identity, belonging, and comparison. Social media makes this worse. The holidays amplify the belief that everyone else is living a fuller, more connected life.

Older adults who live in care facilities or far from family often carry a deep sense of being forgotten. The holidays bring that feeling into sharp focus.

People with very low income feel the emotional strain of the season more intensely. Not being able to provide holiday meals or gifts can create guilt, embarrassment, and hopelessness.

LGBTQ individuals with unsupportive or rejecting families often dread this season. Instead of joy, they feel fear, anxiety, or emotional disconnection.

Survivors of abuse or childhood trauma sometimes face triggers during holiday events. Old wounds can surface with surprising force.

Professionals in caregiving, emergency response, and healthcare roles often feel emotional exhaustion. They support others through crisis while having little room to care for themselves.

Why Suicidal Struggles Increase

Emotional crises and suicidal thoughts rise during the holidays for several key reasons. The season creates contrast. When someone feels dark inside while the world feels bright, the difference becomes painful. Many begin to believe they are falling short even when they are not.

Hopelessness grows when someone cannot see a path forward. Emotional numbness or overwhelming sadness can convince a person that the pain will never end. Most people experiencing suicidal thoughts do not want life to end. They want the suffering to stop and they cannot see any other way.

It is important to know that while national suicide completion rates do not always peak in December, the emotional distress that leads someone to think about suicide rises significantly. Mental health professionals consistently see higher levels of crisis calls, increased self harm attempts, and stronger feelings of despair during the holiday season.

What Those of Us Who Are More Blessed Can Do

If your life is steadier this season, your presence can be a lifeline for someone who is barely holding on. A simple act of kindness may be the difference between someone giving up and someone finding enough strength to make it through another day.

Reach out to people who withdraw. The ones who disappear are usually the ones who need the most support. A message that says you were thinking of them can soften loneliness more than you will ever know.

Invite someone to join your holiday meal or gathering. Even if they decline, the invitation itself tells them they matter.

Listen without trying to fix. Most people in pain only need someone who will sit with them long enough for their hearts to breathe again.

Give quietly. A warm meal, a simple gift, or a small act of generosity restores dignity for someone who feels like they are falling short.

Remember those who are grieving. Speak their loved one’s name. Let them know the memory is not forgotten.

Watch for the quiet ones. Kindness offered early can prevent a crisis later.

Most of all, be gentle. Be patient. Be willing to slow down enough to see who is hurting right in front of you.

A Closing Thought Shared..

The holidays are not the same for everyone. For some they are warm and full. For others they are a season they are simply trying to survive. When we have more, we are called to share more. When our hearts feel steady, we can steady someone else. The smallest kindness can remind a hurting soul that the world has not forgotten them. Compassion is free. Its impact is priceless